We had a fun day at the pool with cousin Holden!
I've been reading the handsfreemama.com blog for a while, and almost every post makes me really think about the kind of mama I am and want to be. Each post makes me remember similar situations in my own life that I made a choice to be "hands free" with my child (or not). I think every working mama carries a heavy amount of guilt about all the time and attention that our jobs take away from our kids, our families, and our energy levels. I know after a day with my preschoolers, I don't have the energy to cook, clean, play, do a load of laundry, give Kirk a bath, read books before bed, sing good night songs, walk on the treadmill, read, do my own homework (only 3 classes left at MSU!), and get to bed before midnight. There are some evenings I can do all of those things, but most nights I just can't do it all.
Reading about being "hands free" has made me really think about the choices I make with my family. You would think after 10 years of being with preschoolers, I would remember to be fully present with my own child and family. My home and personal life seem to hold so many more distractions, chores, and tedious tasks that take up my time. The cleaning can wait. I need to listen. I need to respond. Enjoy the moment. When Kirk cries in the middle of the night, I need to remember that he won't do this forever, and cherish an opportunity to rock him and comfort him. He's too big for my lap. He wants to do everything "by himself." He can almost make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich by himself. He can fold towels and match socks in the laundry. He is almost FOUR YEARS OLD. Time is passing by too quickly with my baby boy. I want to be "hands free," without distractions, and really look and listen to my boy. I only have one chance to be his mama. I will make mistakes, I know. I just want to be present, fully present, for our family. When I have a day (or part of a day) that I feel like I was fully present, it makes me feel whole.
I hope to enjoy my summer days. We'll go to the pool (and I will "watch me Mama!" when he asks!). We'll hang out at home. Kirk says he loves me "all the way down to the Techno Drome" (Ninja Turtles reference) and that he wants to marry me. I hope he always feels that way about his mama. He is more important than the distractions.
If you haven't read "Hands Free Mama," you should start today. There is a link to the right ---->
You can also join the "Hands Free Revolution" on Facebook. Check it out. That few minutes of distraction are well worth your time.
